Stop. The. Presses. Or the internet. Or whatever one would stop when one has breaking news. It has come to my attention recently that today, September 22, is one of the most important days of the year. Well, at least, it’s up there with Con Air Day and International Left-Handers’ Day. That’s right, friends and relations, many happy returns…because it’s Elephant Appreciation Day. Hell. Yeah.

First started in 1996, Elephant Appreciation Day is just that. Are you appreciating elephants yet? No? What if I told you that you could learn the elephant dance for the day? Or bake the elephant cake? Or make the elephant sign? Oh, and of course you must learn the elephant poem. Here is a snippet.

They don’t play with electric wires;
I never have heard of them starting fires.

They have no vices and do not smoke.
An Elephant is a kindly bloke…

When in school, they do not cheat.
They walk in lines which are quite neat.

Yes, friends. You’re welcome. Go out and spread the Good Word of the elephant. This is big, people. Like, real big. I don’t even know how to explain how big. If only there were some other really large thing I could compare this to, that would also be relevant to the post! Damn.

photo credit: digitalART2’s flickr photostream/Creative Commons