The national unemployment rate is 7.2%. Job losses are at their highest annual level since World War II. Even a Kennedy can’t get a political gig.

So one might think that the “Obama Administration” (still getting used to saying THAT) might be just a wee bit interested in creating as many jobs as possible.

Oh, wait.

That’s what a REASONABLE Administration would want. But then there are those who would rather consign the Land of the Free to become China’s largest province (albeit with extra cheese).

We’re looking at you, Mr. Man from Hawaii. Or Indonesia. Or wherever you claim to have been born.

Because despite 2.6 million jobs lost in 2008 (thank you very much, Democratic-controlled Congress), despite the fact that Uncle Sam’s picture has been replaced by a Norwegian who underbid on the “America’s national symbol” contract…

Some Norwegian guy

and despite outgoing Administration staffers being forced to take positions at Abercrombie & Fitch — where valued Bush team hallmarks such as absolute, unquestioning loyalty and strict ideological purity don’t mean Jack if they don’t come with rock-hard abs (which we KNOW were not a priority in 43’s White House) …

If you were fat, powerful and white, you'd smile, too.

– “President Obama” (still getting used to saying that, too) is clearly more concerned with eliminating jobs rather than creating them.

So when the radical left sings the praises of their Dear Leader’s jabillion dollar stimulus package which they assert will add three million new jobs as it rebuilds our infrastructure, revitalizes our educational system, and reduces our dependence on foreign oil (What? No “Everyone-Gets-A-Free-Unicorn Omnibus Reconciliation Act”?), someone needs to ask why Dear Leader wants to shut down a perfectly viable American enterprise:

What kind of a message is sent to the struggling American worker when you close a valuable, hyper-functional facility and toss its skilled employees onto the street (or into Guantanamo Bay, as the case may be)? It’s not like Gitmo is a steel mill or an auto factory. Gitmo is NECESSARY! You don’t see General Motors shielding us from evil (well, except for their Humvee division – BOOYAH!) One hopes that the President’s plans include job training for the soon-to-be-unemployed-of-Gitmo, because more than a few new resumes are going to appear on Monster.com for such talented ex-workers as …

Prison Guards – a/k/a, “Gitmo Backbone’s,” “America’s Last Line of Defense,” “Paul Blart: Mall Cop Rejects,” who maintain order among the most ruthless killers on the planet. Think of what a guard’s workday is like: they’re surrounded by godless Communist Cubans, the prisoners they oversee have “Death To America” tattooed inside their eyelids, and those prisoners, let’s face it, all look the same (yeah, I said it), so you can never tell if one of them went Shawshank and escaped. One bearded swarthy America-hater in orange looks like any other. (Yeah, I said it again! BOOYAH!)

Flight Crews – Last time we checked, United and Continental don’t offer flights to Gitmo. So a whole bunch of superbly trained pilots who logged thousands upon thousands of air miles on the Afghanistan-Syria-Libya-Sudan Terrorist Shuttle are now out of work. And while everyone’s wetting themselves over “Sully” Sullenberger’s Miracle Landing on the Hudson (has Robert Downey, Jr., been cast for that role yet?), let’s not forget about the other great Americans who sport pilot’s wings out there. Pilot’s wings dipped in the Hudson River of Freedom.

Legal Staff – Also hitting the bricks will be the scores of attorneys and paralegals. Because in a world of evildoers — i.e., the ACLU — who want to “protect” the “rights” of the “spuriously arrested goat herders” who had “never even thought of taking up arms against the United States” until they were “snatched from their Waziristani mud-and-dung huts” and “introduced to ‘enhanced interrogation techniques’” so that the first thing they will do when they get out is “go medieval (think Saladin) on a whole lotta Westerners,” you needed some strong mouthpieces with J.D.’s in your corner to fight against them.

Or just to look the other way.

“Special assistants” – The folks listed above can eventually find similar positions back in the U.S. But those who do the unsung work in the background (some would say “in the shadows”) will be hard-pressed to find gainful employment in their respective specialties. Hence, this is a call to you, the public. Flip through your Outlook Contacts and your Rolodexes (do people still even use those?) and see if you can recommend leads for the following courageous employees:

• Death-by-drowning simulators
• Koran-in-the-toilet flushers
• Hang-up-by-your-arms-from-the-ceiling hanger-people
• Ear-bleedingly loud music DJs

And finally, a word about the true patriots behind so much of what went on at Guantanamo Bay, the heroes and heroines of the Central Intelligence Agen

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