When Cubicle Met Cardio: The Elliptical Machine Office Desk

Sal holds a Political Science degree from the George Washington University. He's written about all things environment since 2007.

“Hey, boss, is it cool if I dip out a bit early to hit the gym?”

This excuse, leaned on by you and your conspiring coworkers for years to shave 20 minutes off your evening commutes, could go the way of the Dodo bird thanks to a revolutionary chair—the Elliptical Machine Office Desk.

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Does this elliptical desk chair make my Excel spreadsheet more fascinating?  (Photo: Hammacher Schlemmer)

On sale at high-end trinket store Hammacher Schlemmer, the device claims to allow riders (or should it be ellipticalists?) to burn 4,000 calories in a typical workweek without breaking a sweat.

Yup, weight loss sans perspiration.

Apparently the bikechair’s pedals are designed in such a way as to be pushed at slower cadences which a) won’t distract you from that riveting Excel spreadsheet and b) won’t cause you to crack open a sweat gland.

The device has the important-sounding features required of all 21st century gym equipment: adjustable-height desk that pairs with a semi-recumbent elliptical trainer, information displays for 30 individuals on its 4" x 6" LED screen, and swivel seats.

Sidebar: What ever happened to simple looking, sounding, and operating workout devices? Like the pull-up bar? Or the medicine ball? If it was good enough for Jim Thorpe and Babe Didrickson, then why not me, you, and the meathead at Gold's Gym sharpening his triceps on pivoting cable handles?

One thing’s for sure about this deskerciser: trimming your tummy in full view of your peers sure ain’t cheap. The device and accompanying desk run about $8,000. Plus an extra $450 in shipping fees.

The apparatus is a natural progression of an idea that began with the standing chair and continued with treadmill desks.

Makes us ponder what’s next?

Perhaps a helmet that allows you to dial into a Madison Avenue video conference call while you, your brother-in-law, his college roommate, and three sherpas are schlepping it up the south side of K2.

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