Solution to Invasive Species: Samurai Swords and Wolverine Claws
The government can't stop the rapidly spreading foreign invader, so some citizens are taking matters into their own clawed hands.
Asian carp: sounds harmless enough, delicious even. But they belong in Asia (hence the name). Someone decided to defy nature's natural boundaries and brought some Asian carp to America, where they slowly filled up the Mississippi River. It's not just that they're in the wrong place, they also eat all the food and destroy local fish populations. Unless we want our rivers filled with only Asian carp, something must be done. Something... drastic.
The government has built electric barriers to kill the fish, as they desperate try to prevent them from getting out of the Mississippi and into the Great Lakes and then to rivers everywhere. These young gentlemen from Peoria have taken a different angle: water skis plus swords. Warning: graphic fish deaths depicted:
Taking advantage of the fact that the fish jump from the water when scared by engine noise, the water skiing hunter goes to town with samurai swords, wolverine claws, and spiky armor. The carnage is horrific. But it's not making a dent in the hordes of Asian Carp. It's pretty easy to view this all as a metaphor for our relationship with China—but try not to, because we're not going to be deploying water skiing samurais to deal with our trade deficit anytime soon.
Would-be animal hunters, take note: Asian Carp aren't the only invasive species problem we have. The snakehead, a fish which can walk on land and eats everything in sight, is slowly taking over New York. Go kill them in any way you can. And even more dangerously, there are pythons in the Everglades. Someone go make a video of killing one of those with some Wolverine claws.
[Hat tip: Switchboard]
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